Dunn suggests that instead of “telling” youth, we “pace” with youth:
· He describes pacing as a language of love. “Pacing requires me to listen to the heart of an adolescent, seeing beyond words and behaviors.” This will require “time” of leaders, more than just surface conversations. “Pacing builds trust. Trust produces relationship. Relationship conceives spiritual life exchanges. Such exchanges are the sacred places where the Holy Spirit reaches through the life of a Christian spiritual caregiver to change forever the life of a student.” (16)
· He describes the notion that we must overcome the urge to tell. “Telling can be contrasted with pacing in the following ways” (18):
o “Telling enters the relationship with an agenda: communicating what an adolescent should be experiencing, thinking or doing. Pacing’s agenda is to understand what the adolescent is experiencing, thinking, or doing.”
o “Telling emphasizes the teaching and advice-giving abilities of an adult. Pacing emphasizes the listening and care-giving abilities of an adult.”
o “Telling emphasizes the adult’s expertise and knowledge about God’s will for adolescent lives. Pacing emphasizes the adult’s heart for hearing God’s will at work in the life of a particular adolescent.”
o “Telling has as its initial goals the student’s assent to and application of godly advice. Pacing has as its initial goals a student’s authenticity in relationship to God and the adult.”
· He describes Jesus as a pacer. Like Jesus, “Leading requires speaking truth, in love, into another person’s life.” (19) “Jesus not only considered what needed to be said but also how it needed to be heard. Jesus’ model of disciplemaking was simple: listen and learn (pace with), and then lead.” (20)
· He describes pacing as a language of love. “Pacing requires me to listen to the heart of an adolescent, seeing beyond words and behaviors.” This will require “time” of leaders, more than just surface conversations. “Pacing builds trust. Trust produces relationship. Relationship conceives spiritual life exchanges. Such exchanges are the sacred places where the Holy Spirit reaches through the life of a Christian spiritual caregiver to change forever the life of a student.” (16)
· He describes the notion that we must overcome the urge to tell. “Telling can be contrasted with pacing in the following ways” (18):
o “Telling enters the relationship with an agenda: communicating what an adolescent should be experiencing, thinking or doing. Pacing’s agenda is to understand what the adolescent is experiencing, thinking, or doing.”
o “Telling emphasizes the teaching and advice-giving abilities of an adult. Pacing emphasizes the listening and care-giving abilities of an adult.”
o “Telling emphasizes the adult’s expertise and knowledge about God’s will for adolescent lives. Pacing emphasizes the adult’s heart for hearing God’s will at work in the life of a particular adolescent.”
o “Telling has as its initial goals the student’s assent to and application of godly advice. Pacing has as its initial goals a student’s authenticity in relationship to God and the adult.”
· He describes Jesus as a pacer. Like Jesus, “Leading requires speaking truth, in love, into another person’s life.” (19) “Jesus not only considered what needed to be said but also how it needed to be heard. Jesus’ model of disciplemaking was simple: listen and learn (pace with), and then lead.” (20)
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